turn down the lights
turn down the bed
turn down these voices
inside my head
lay down with me
tell me no lies
just hold me close
don't patronize
don't patronize me

i can't make you love me if you don't
you can't make your heart feel
somethin' it wont
here in the dark,in these final hours
i will lay down my heart
and feel the power if you wont
no you wont
cuz i can't make you love me
if you don't

i'll close my eyes
then i wont see
the love you dont feel
when your holdin' me
morning will come
and i'll do whats right
just give me till then
to give up this fight
and i will give up this fight

Tomorrow.

A heart will stop beating. 

A baby will never born. 

A baby will never take a first breath.

A baby will never be named.

A baby will never get the chance to live. 

To laugh.

To love. 

My heart hurts for you baby, and the decisions of your immature mother.

For your sake, I will name you.

Your name, unborn beautiful baby is Lee. 

I won't forget you, beautiful Lee. 

Can you tell my dad I say hi up in Heaven? 

If dreams could come true.

I would have you. 

Too much

I have too many feelings for such a small person. 

I'm too pocketsized to feel all these things at once.

My heart hurts. 

Do you want me?

Like I want you?

Or am I standing still?

I am not alone.

I'm surrounded by love. 

I have family that loves me, even though they are far away.

I have a best friend, who would drop everything for me. 

I am surrounded by roommates that put up with my bullshit everyday, but don't bitch. 

I have friends in lots of places, all of which care for me. 

So why is it, that without you, you one single person, I so feel alone?

There is a lump in my throat, and it won't go away, no matter what I do, no matter what I say. 

please just call me. 

The more boys I meet, the more I love my dog.

Carrie Underwood knows what the heck she's talking about. 

This boy here wants to move too fast
He sees my future as having a past
Well, I don't think so
I don't think so

That boy there, well he's playing a fool
He thinks he's funny and he thinks he's cool
We'll I don't think so
I don't think so

Cheap date, bad taste, another night gone to waste
Talking about nothing in so many words
It's not like I'm not trying
'Cause I'll give anyone a shot once

And, I , I close my eyes
And, I kiss that frog
Each time finding
The more boys I meet the more I love my dog

Here's this guy, thinks he's bad to the bone
He wants to pick me up and take me home
Well, I don't think so
I don't think so

Cage fights, PlayStation, X-Games, Raider Nation
Oversize pants with an ego to match
It's not like I'm not trying
'Cause I'll give anyone a shot once

And, I , I close my eyes
And, I kiss that frog
Each time finding
The more boys I meet the more I love my dog

Why can't they be like the one's that mean everything to me
The warm and loyal, open and friendly
It's not like I'm not trying
'Cause I'll give anyone a shot once

I close my eyes
And, I kiss that frog
Each time finding
The more boys I meet the more I love my

I close my eyes
And, I kiss that frog
Each time finding
The more boys I meet the more I love my dog

The more I love my dog

Sing it sister. 

A song.

well you might be a bit confused 
and you might be a little bit bruised 
but baby how we spoon like no one else 
so I will help you read those books 
if you will soothe my worried looks 
and we will put the lonesome on the shelf 

oh let’s get rich and buy our parents homes in the South of France 
let's get rich and give everybody nice sweaters 
and teach them how to dance 
let's get rich and build our house on a mountain 
making everybody look like ants 
from way up there you and I, you and I 

I don't know anymore.

I'm having another one of those days. 

A snuggle-with-your-teddy-bear-and-anything-else-within-a-5-foot-radius-day. 

I feel blah.

I feel ignored. 

I feel forgotten. 

'Cos I dont know who I am, who I am without you
All I know is that I should
And I don't know if I could stand another hand upon you
All I know is that I should
'Cos she will love you more than I could
She who dares to stand where I stood

My body

Is literally rejecting the concept of sex.

It makes my period late.

It bleeds almost everytime I do it.

And now, from the same brand of condom we have been using since the begining, I have hives in places no one should ever have hives. 

Freaking figures. 

It would be impossible.

I am not pregnant.

I command myself not to be. 

Someone call the doctor, got a case of love bi-polar.

I broke a rule today.

One of those "hook-up buddy" rules. 

Whoops. 

I told the truth. 

You did too.

I didn't like your truth. 

All we can do is keep breathing.

All that I know is that I'm breathing.

All I can do is keep breathing.

All we can do is keep breathing. 

All we can do is keep breathing. 

The ability...

...to remember everything comes in handy at times. 

But it also sucks. 

I have this ability to remember dates and numbers.

It's obscene. 

For example, the "boy" and I met on January 21st. 

I had my first kiss on 15th of April, 6 years ago. 

I first started as editor-in-cheif flying solo on September 20, 2006. 

I remember everything.

Which is why I can't get what you said out of my head. 

10 Things...

Ten things I wish you knew about me.

Ten things I wish I could tell you. 

1) I am so open to new things. Just because I say I don't like something doesn't mean that I'm not willing to try again. 

2) I am very low maintenance. I don't know how to be complicated, and even if I did, I would still not be it. 

3) I have a really big heart. I am a nice, caring person by nature. 

4) I am a total perfectionist. If I can't get it right the first time, I will continue to do so until it is right. 

5) I get overwhelmed by situations easily. If something doesn't go my way, or I hear the word no, I'm pretty much a goner. 

6) I love making the world happy by just being me. 

7) I smile whenever I can. There is no use wasting my time with a sour face. 

8) I love people. I love being around them and hearing about their lives. I am a great listener...and a great talker too. 

9) I am into reality checks. Being realistic is something I have always been my entire life, and it has gotten me to where I am today. 

10) I am the nicest person in the world when your on my good side, but I can go from zero to bitch in .5 seconds. 

<33

Tonight..

Just for tonight.

My heart doesn't hurt.

My body doesn't ache.

My mind is as peace. 

Just for tonight.

I'm okay. <3

Stuck

We can't move forward.

We refuse to go back.

We won't go left.

And we defiently won't go right. 

Sideways won't work. 

Upside down stinks. 

Diagnally is not going to cut it. 

Were stuck. 

But, at the very least, we are together. 

You could write a book

..on how to ruin a perfect life. 

Everyone.

Hey did you want to tell me how to live my life?

Or why don't you just tell me how to feel.

Did you want to analyze things for me?

Or why don't you just tell me what to do.

Or hey, while your at it, why don't you just live my life for me! That's a thought...Considering I'm doing such a crappy job living my life!

Hey everyone who ever told me what to do...Fuck off. 

I'm doing just fine. 

As if I could define how I feel in my own words...

Dreaming about the day when you wake up and find
That what you're looking for has been here the whole time

If you could see that I'm the one who understands you
Been here all along, so why can't you see?
You, you belong with me, you belong with me

Walking the streets with you and your worn-out jeans
I can't help thinking this is how it ought to be
Laughing on a park bench, thinking to myself
Hey, isn't this easy?

And you've got a smile that could light up this whole town
I haven't seen it in a while since she brought you down
You say you're fine, I know you better than that
Hey, what ya doing with a girl like that?

Somewhere in between...

Somewhere in between the talking, the laughter, the drunk pick ups and drop offs..

Somewhere in between the tutoring, the stories, the late night make out sessions...

Somewhere in between the me loosing my virginity to you, the getting to know you...

Somewhere in between the tennis matches, the making each other feel better....

Somewhere in between the flirting and the staring in eachother's eyes....

I fell for you. 

If I could define what we are....

I got you, I got you on my mind
And it's time to make you see (What I want)
So I'll just make this a little more obvious
'Cos I get what I want
And I want you to get with me

Don't think you know
How far I'm gonna go

You can't stop this feeling
You can't run away
Baby I'm what's on your mind
You can't stop this feeling
There's no escape
No sleep tonight
You won't get no sleep tonight

You want me,
You want me all the time
And you don't need nothing else
But you seem to be a little oblivious
So I'll show you the way
If you think that you need some help

Tell me baby
Are you coming with me

You can't stop this feeling
You can't run away
Baby I'm what's on your mind
You can't stop this feeling
There's no escape
No sleep tonight
You won't get no sleep tonight
No sleep tonight
No sleep tonight

Boy you won't be sleeping
No sleep tonight
Do I have to spell it out in black and white
Boy you won't be sleeping
No sleep tonight
Do I have to spell it out in black and white
No sleep tonight
No sleep tonight
No sleep tonight

Re: Last post

Let's emphaisize the "Should" in the last post.

Because we both won't quit. 

I just wish I could quit you.